☀️ my dad is very good at beating cancer

My dad turned 70 this weekend, and in our family, that is a very big deal.

He has beaten cancer three times. The third time, it came back stage 4 in his liver, and it was aggressive. We were so scared. There was a stretch where I cried every day for what I think was a whole year.

But he beat it. It turns out my dad is very good at beating cancer.

There's another reason 70 matters. He is the first person in his immediate family to make it this far. His parents and siblings all passed in their 60s. So when he got that diagnosis at 67, he almost felt a kind of superstitious inevitability.

So we made a family promise. On your 70th birthday, we're going to go all out.

And we did, in the most Dad way possible.

My dad is a history buff. Growing up, we called him Encyclopedia Ken. On family vacations, we stopped at every historical marker he could find. When I was little, I didn't really get it. Now I'm a grown woman who gets genuinely excited when I spot one of those signs on the side of the road.

On Saturday we drove up to Kansas City and took the Harry S. Truman home tour in Independence. Most of us had done it before. My dad could probably give the tour himself, and he has been known to prompt the tour guide when they leave out a fact. "Anything cool in that garage over there?" (He's the best. 😆)

Later that day, we took a historic ghost tour of Lee's Summit. It was meant to be light, so I didn't expect to be so moved by it. Today those storefronts are cute boutiques and bookstores. But our guide told us why each building was first built and everything it had to survive to still be standing: fires, new wiring, new plumbing. At one point he pointed out an old gas valve still poking out of the ceiling. It used to power the chandelier.

I felt a rich, almost euphoric feeling. So many people had stood right where I was standing. They had hard days and good days, and they kept going. The building kept going too.

I almost sent this to you as just a happy life update. I wasn't sure it had anything to do with habits. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that looking back is a real skill. It can even be a source of habit goal motivation.

This week's habit hack: Read your own historical marker

When you hit a hard day, stop for a minute, the way my dad stops for a roadside plaque. Ask yourself, "What have I already lived through?" Name one specific thing. The year you thought would never end. The thing you were sure you couldn't do, and then did.

That's how confidence gets built. It's stacked evidence.

You have survived your own fires and rewiring. Parts of you that used to do one job now hold up something new. Sometimes the old story about who you are isn't true anymore. And you are still standing.

The science

Looking back is actually a strength. If you've ever taken CliftonStrengths (it used to be called StrengthsFinder), one of the 34 themes is called Context. People strong in Context love thinking about the past, and they understand the present by learning its history. When things feel noisy and confusing, looking at how it all started helps them make better decisions now. Gallup says it can even make them wiser about the future, because they saw its seeds being planted in the past.

It's not super common. Only about 9% of people who take the assessment have Context in their Top 5.

On the other side is a theme called Futuristic, for people who are fired up by what could be. Gallup actually suggests Context people team up with someone strong in Futuristic or Strategic.

(My top five, by the way, are Individualization, Communication, WOO, Strategic, and Empathy. What are yours? Hit reply and tell me. I'd love to know.)

So which one are you, a look-back person or a look-ahead person? If you're always looking ahead, try borrowing a little Context this week. If you naturally look back, give yourself some credit. That isn't living in the past. It's a strength.

Mindset script

"I have been through hard things before, and I'm still here. I don't need to know how the whole story ends. I just need to take the next right step."

My dad didn't know how his story would end either. He just kept showing up for the next appointment, the next treatment, the next day. And now he's 70.

Bonus journal prompt

If there were a historical marker in front of your life right now, what would it say?

And one more thing. If there's someone in your life worth celebrating, tell them this week. You don't have to wait for the big birthday.

Happy 70th, Dad. Here's hoping cancer is officially ancient history. (And Go Chiefs!)

xoxo, Katie Day, your habit hype girl (write back soon)

Dad on his 70th birthday at the Truman Home in Independence. Encyclopedia Ken in his happy place. ;)

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