☀️ well that’s never happened before

The very first challenge that set the tone for my radical year of self-improvement was my decision to go alcohol-free.

I haven’t decided if I’m going to talk too much about this on social media because I know it can feel polarizing to read about.

But ya’ll are my newsletter crew, my ride-or-dies, so you get the REAL real.

My last drink was on January 6th, 2024 which means yesterday was 6 months of having no alcohol in my system. 🤯

What I thought was going to just be a “Dry January”, I decided to group with February and make it an “8-week-challenge” as I followed the book Euphoric by Karolina Rzadkowolska.

By the end of the 8-week, challenge...

I no longer had any desire to drink.

I was as surprised as you are. I had actually reprogrammed all of my self-limiting beliefs that had kept me drinking alcohol.

Now when someone hears you don’t drink anymore, they might conjure up images of dramatic alcoholics surrounded by empty bottles who lost their jobs and families and were completely out of control.

Mine was more of this quiet background noise of “it will be nice to pour a glass when this day is over.” Or “this brunch is fun, but you know what would make it EPIC?? Mimosas!” “Laundry is boring…but having a white claw as you fold for hours would make it a laundry PARTY.”

Alcohol was this little temptress quietly whispering…you’re not having as much fun as you could be.

Re: you’re not present in your life right now.

It was subtle. But it was bothering me.

By doing the journal prompts in the book, I was able to journal out some of my limiting beliefs around alcohol:

My identity is “the fun one”. Therefore: I am not fun unless I’m drinking.

I will make everyone else have less fun if I’m not drinking.

People might stop including me if they associate me with being "sober". “Should we invite Katie?…well it’s at a brewery, I don’t want her to feel weird, let’s not invite her.”

Then there were some science questions I had.

The truth is: I wasn’t feeling good.

I kept nearly falling asleep at 2pm needing a nap.

I couldn’t figure out how to lose the extra 30 pounds that was hanging on for dear life after Covid EVEN THOUGH I was fasting for 18 hours and trying everything from keto to vegan. (But always managing to find a diet plan that included wine as ok!)

In general, I felt low energy, low mood, low focus, and a general constant low-level feeling of dread.

There was just this little inkling.

My gut is telling me my life might be a little bit better without it.

Those closest to me have heard me say this a million times about a million different situations: “I like to play offense not defense”.

What I mean in this case is: rather than waiting for the next social situation to test out my “alcohol-free experiment”, I was going to create some.

I made myself a “Sober Fun Bucket List” and I told my close friends about it.

This included everything fun I might be used to doing with a drink in my hand, I would do with a Soda Lime instead:

Karaoke
Hosting a Chief's Watch Party
Art Opening at A Brewery
Springfield Creatives Networking Event
Girls Group Weekend Getaway
Nate Bergatze’s Stand-up
Dancing in public
Doing an improv show
Date night with Jared
Airplane/Airport
Craft & Commerce Conference
Traveling with Jared

Each time I would do an event and still HAVE FUN or BE FUN, I would find that old limiting belief loosen until it was gone completely.

What I learned is this:

I am fun. Period.

It was never the drink.

Instead of worrying what people might think, I asked them in advance for their support and I got it.

I also asked them for feedback and I got it.

This was the 8-week report:

“You are the MOST fun. It was never the drink.” -Kelly, my sister

“Dare I say you are better? I feel like I’m best friends with the belle of the ball. Like that’s MY FRIEND!” -Shailey

“I want what she’s having. Oh nothing? Damn. Maybe it’s just her.” -Emily

“I loved watching you ‘Katie Day’.” -Amber, after Karaoke 🥹

“YOU are magnetic. YOU are fun. YOU are inspirational. I’m proud of you. That’s a lot of work and it shows.” -Jenn

“There was a trade. Nights for mornings. I feel like I traded your tipsy evenings for quality mornings. I think you should keep at it. Also, you’re a pretty delightful person so drunk or sober is really all good.” -Jared, my husband

“You seem to be more comfortable in your skin and proud of your body and that has had verrrrry fun benefits.” -Jared 🔥😏

After 3 months of disproving this belief, I started to challenge ALL of my limiting beliefs.

What else do I believe I cannot live without? I decided to give up Diet Coke. Then sugar. Then dairy.

It’s like all of these eliminations started to play together and I noticed my skin and my face-puffiness transform.

Left: The last time I drank. I intentionally chose the worst "drunk eyes" photo for your pleasure. You're welcome. ;)
Note the rosacea, my skin was probably crying for help.

I don’t think I had any clue how much inflammation was in my body! It was not only consuming my energy for my body to constantly be fighting off but was weighing me down and affecting my sleep quality.

Suddenly, I felt good.

Guys, I felt really freaking good!

I don’t think I realized how low I felt until I felt good again.

After 90 days, my dopamine levels reset and I started to feel INTENSE pleasure over the tiniest, smallest things. I felt those feelings intensify AGAIN after I ditched sugar.

It was nuts how removing these things that artificially spike my “joy centers”, it allowed the subtleties of life to light my up instead.

It’s like I'd been binging artificial strawberry soda for weeks, then switched to water, then suddenly a real strawberry tasted unbelievable.

So after 6 months, I had one final Fun Bucket List item to check off:

A whole week of celebrating Fourth of July poolside with my family.

This felt like “graduate school”. Something I would ordinarily go into “binge mode”, “vacation mode” and “oh well, I’ll just fast next week” and “I don’t really have a choice, it’s what we do. I deserve this.”

I decided to change the thought “I deserve to binge.” to “I deserve to stay on plan.” “I deserve to keep feeling this good.” “I deserve to still prioritize sleep, walks, my morning routine, eating the greens I’ve somehow learned to crave.” “I deserve to step on the scale Monday and see that it hasn’t changed instead of feeling like ‘crap time to undo the progress I’ve lost.”

So I stuck to the plan. And I felt gooooood. I enjoyed my family for the wonderful humans they are. I soaked in the kids' laughter and the witty conversation. I felt the pool water cool my sunny skin as I sipped my kombucha. I still got up and sang with the band. 😆

And I stepped on the scale Monday to find it on the exact same number I left it the week prior.

“Well, this has never happened before.”

What about you? Is there anything your gut has been whispering to you “this seems a little off…I wonder.” Hit reply and let me know! Rooting for you SO HARD.

xoxo- Katie Day (write back soon!)

Current Read:

Just finished The Big Leap by Gay Hendricks for the second time this year and I'm going to read it a third time, too. I think it's THAT important for me to grasp. It is all about "the Upper Limit Problem", a negative emotional reaction that occurs when anything positive enters our lives. Re: "Things are going too well, something bad has to happen next." It not only prevents happiness, but it actually stops us from achieving our goals. It is the ultimate life roadblock.

Annual Book Goal Progress: 21/52

Current Growth Goal:

I'm noticing I'm completing a lot of my tasks just barely in the nick of time. I'm looking for ways to create margin this week and get ahead of my days. Right after I press send on this email, I'm going to time-block my week and include breaks, walks, and play.

Up Next:

You all challenged me to give up caffeine. (THE ONE THING I HAVE LEFT! jk, jk) I'm not ready quite yet, but I'm down to two cups of coffee per day so I am going to ween to one by next Monday, then I'll be ready to sub it for "mushroom coffee" as you challenged. This should be fun. 😆 (Is it gross?)